Let the Record Show That Crises Are Not My Forte

It's taken me a week to muster up the courage and strength and energy to finish the Disasters Resurrected trilogy.  Remember the two earlier installments?  Mice: The Scourge of the Drywall Industry and Ants: The Silent Horde of Destruction?

Well, dear readers, this brings you to today's installment in the continuing saga: Floods: The Rivers and Tidepools Lurking In Your Basement.  When we last left you, there was drippage.  On an early morning jaunt down to my in-process-of-creating office/meeting room, I was horrified (a mild description of my reaction, by the way) to discover that lo and behold, my newly de-anted dishwasher leaked in its inaugural washing through the drywall ceiling in our finished basement.  All over the floor.  All over my semi-newly (because I've gotten slack and can't seem to muster motivation to finish the dang project) painted kitchen cabinet doors.  Thankfully, not all over my new (furniture-esque) filing cabinet or desk where my work papers are stacked.

But this is what I saw:



Drippy drywall complete with it's own drip hole!



Nicely newly bubbled wood laminate floors!

Now, thanks to some really fine medication, I am a crybaby no more.  But between ants and then mice and now floods, I was way over the edge.  Thankfully, I also have a really fine sister who happens to be extremely practical and helpful and calm when her sister calls in a tearful panic requesting "i-i-i-i-nfor-ma-ma-ma-tion on a g-g-g-good pl-u-u-umber!"  Karen, having more wits about her than I did (dimwit?  halfwit?  you could check either box on my form), suggested calling the Professional Pest Control Company first to let them know what happened when their employee pushed my dishwasher back in after spraying and then calling an appliance company to fix my dishwasher snafu.  And the crazy girl even offered to LEAVE WORK and come over (although, I assured her that thanks to her calming presence and the pan of brownies I ate during our conversation I was feeling much better).  See?  I do believe her love language is "acts of service."

Professional Pest Control Company was very apologetic and sympathetic and quick to offer to pay/help/schedule needed repairs to my ceiling and dishwasher and whatever else needed to be done.  When I offered the silver lining of no live ants spotted that morning, the owner chuckled and said that they had probably all drowned.  Sadly, I was not quite back in my Happy Place and ready to chuckle along.

And this is what I collected after placing a bucket under the leak approximately 24 hours after disaster struck (which means, guess how much had already fallen and hung out on my floor):

2+ inches of slime water!

Wonder Duane came over a few mornings later and replaced the copper tubing connection for my dishwasher.  He also restored my Happy Place Humor.  A functional dishwasher after several days of non-functional dishwasher is a good thing.  I know.  I'm spoiled.  I do, indeed, realize that there are starving children in Armenia who don't even have a dishwasher.

Wonder Jeff came over a few nights later to begin repairs on my drywall ceiling.  And, well, yes, I certainly was the Charming Homeowner once again.  Need a ladder?  Here you go, Wonder Jeff!  Desk in your way?  I'll move it, Wonder Jeff!  Howling dog driving you insane?  I'll stuff her with treats, Wonder Jeff!  So, he got to work and I trotted off to eradicate hunger and bring world peace prepare supper.  And then I heard the dreaded words...

"Ms. Julie??"

And yes, that was Wonder Jeff calling me.  Because heaven forbid this be a simple repair. Heaven forbid this actually go according to plan.  I timidly crept back down the steps to the basement wary of what new disaster would befall me.  And there was Wonder Jeff standing in the midst of the thousands of little mouse poos that had cascaded to his feet when he pulled the old ceiling down. 

Wonder Jeff was just staring at my ceiling. At something in my ceiling.

At the nail that had struck a pipe.  The pipe belonging to my dishwasher. 

The nail that had hit the pipe when the drywall ceiling was originally installed.

Thankfully, it hadn't managed to cause major leakage yet, but Wonder Jeff was hesitant to replace the drywall when it was potentially going to be ruined in the near future by Nail In Pipe Water Explosion.

And you know, there is a strong possibility that I might just throw in the towel and head on over to dishwasher-less Armenia with my pan of brownies.  If they don't have food, I'm pretty sure they don't have nails or pipes or mice or ants over there either.